Midget Blog

The Midget Blog

Well, i was away in the UK for the past week and someone suggested i do a blog on the English. i decieded against this, however she did give me a good idea for Midgets. What are they? Where do they come from? What do they do? How do you treat one?

Well all that will be answered for you below.

What are they?

Midgets are a smaller form of Humans. They usually are jolly type characters, well rounded and grow to a massive 2 feet tall. Puddles post drowning risks so it not unusual for them to be wearing life jackets or floaties when it is raining outside. Small items, usually reserved for 'Not Suitable for 3years and under' apply to midgets as well.

Where do they come from?

Origins of Midgets are somewhat clouded in mystery still to this day. Alot of people have studied them, and spent years on trying to work out exactly where they come from. The most common theory out there is they evolved, just like Humans. However, they didnt come from mammels like our ancestors, they came from more a plant life. To be exact, Potatoes are their origins. They saw the capabilities of these walking, living breathing animals and decided as potatoes, would go up through the dirt and explore life just like the others thus being the first plant life with intellgence.

What do they do?

Midgets dont do much, except they are highly sort after by freak shows where people pay to look, point and laugh at how small they are. This is how they make their earnings. Now, midgets dont need money as most people do (usually cause they cant see above the counter to buy anything) but rather enjoy getting paid with Bananas.

How do you treat a midget?

You have to be delicate when treating midgets as they are fragile and tend to break, espically when you post them through the mail. Just as in freak shows, you can point and laugh at them. They generally enjoy this if you've thrown them a banana first. Whats the worst that could happen? They might bite your ankles, in which case you can easily step on them.

And thats all you need to know about midgets. Any further questions or information needed just ask.

Mr G