Doveton - The Saga Begins

Doveton is something myself and Timothy has thought up of. Its like Neighbours/Home and Away and all that crap. But its a satire. Its based on a real suburb, i hope you enjoy it.

Doveton - Episode 1: The Saga begins.

Our Story begins with our hero, Timothy Awesome, who has just moved from the Upper Class riches off Toorak, to the run down society of Doveton. How has this happen you find yourself asking. Well, read on and you will find out.


Tim in his Stripper Mood

Tim was an elite Porn star. He has such movies like 'Back Door Sluts Enter thru the Front', 'Nurses and Maids are code names for sex' and 'Handicap Porn III'. Any roll Tim wanted, he got. The ladies literally orgasmed over him, the men wanted to be him. He had it all. Fame, Fortune, and a giant penis. However, his latest movie 'Tight Tight Tight Vagina's and One Huge Cock' ended in a tragic misfortune. Timothy's' penis would be changed forever. He tried to put it inside one of the 'Female Star' only that she was sooo tight, it bent his penis sideways. He was banish from the society, unable to work. All his money put into straighting his Penis out. However, even thought his Penis was fixed, Tim was banned from the industry since the Female star, who we can not name for legal reasons, sued and ensured he could never work again.

Desperate and in despair, Tim had no other option but to find accommodation in the only place that would accept jobless, homeless people. The place: Doveton.

It was Monday Morning on August 10th, 2009. Timothy had just bought his new place in windy Doveton. Typical Doveton weather, windy, cold, wet. Tim took the old Princes Highway down past the Prince Mark where he saw his first landmark: Kell Ttitties. Kell Ttitties is the local slut/prostitute. Usually her services are free, which has lead to her being called 'The Hussey'. Tim had to ask for directions as he was all ready lost in this small suburban town, and The Hussey was the only one in sight he could ask for directions. (No one else is up before midday in Doveton). The conversation went like this

Hussey 'What you want love? Blowie? Gobbie? Full Frontal? More into Fetishes? I can do the Ping Pong Show! Learnt it from the Asian couple down on Ti Tree Drive'

Tim 'Uh..I'm looking for directions. See, I'm new in town. I'm trying to get to Hibiscus Court. I'm Tim. And you are?'

Hussey 'Kell. But people call me The Hussey. Go straight down, turn right, than left, hang another left, head up pass one, two, three men i slept with this morning, and hang a right. Cant miss it. Blowjob for your troubles?'

Tim 'Uh...No...no...thanks.'

With that, Tim speed off, quite taken back by this Hussey Character.

On the way to his place, Tim notice two very different gangs that occupied Doveton. We have, hanging out at Linden place in 'their territory' West Side, which looks pretty much like a gay song and dance all the time, in fact Tim saw them rehearsing to the lyrics of The Sound of Music. Also he noticed the other gang, East Side Stoners hanging at Autumn Place. They are pretty much stoners who do nothing but smoke and deal pot all day and are too lazy to even bother trying to defend their territory from West Side. More on them later.

Tim arrived at his new place and there he met his, well, eccentric neighbour, Katherine 'The Cat Lady' Sourgrape. Upon arriving, he was greeted by a cat being thrown in his face. 'NOT ANOTHER DEADBEAT DOLE BLUDGER IN MY COURT' shouted Katherine. Tim had good mind to put her in her place, but decided against it since he was half way to his door. Upon entering, there we see his two new roommates: David Ganja and Stephen Wasted. Two Stoners who do nothing but smoke pot and deal weed all day and live off the dole.

David 'Hey man....what? Cool.'

Steve 'Yeah man....who? Cool.'

Tim 'Uh, hi. I'm Tim. Nice to meet you'

David 'Dude, someone....nah spacing again'

Steve 'Nah i...see it.'

Tim 'Well, I'm your new roommate. What is with this place? Everyone seems so...odd'

David 'Nah bro....this is Doveton'

Steve 'Dove....tin'

Tim 'Oh...god no'

To be contuined....